I Am Who I Am

August 9th, 2023

Writing this blog post out of frustration for just, the way I've been living my life.

Throughout the past many years, I've grown tired of just... defending myself. Every day something new happens. Queers continue to be attacked by alt-right media. Centrists continue to do nothing in response. This is tiring, just being a queer person. I'm living with parents who are falling flat for these pundits violent rhetoric, and it's grown increasingly worrying that there's nothing I can do to help them realize the truth.

But, I'm hoping to enact something tonight at this blog post's release that might convince my mom in specific to believe me, as a queer, for once. So, this blog post isn't going to be about that. This blog post, is going to be about queers. And how I've grown tired of defending my position that I draw cub art.

I grow increasingly tired of having to repeatedly re-explain my points, find new analogies, or just tell everyone that "no, I'm not in fact an evil person for engaging with media that helps me cope with my trauma". I've grown tired of trying to appeal to close-minded people who get immediate hostility at the very moment I dare say the word "cub". God forbid I bring up Inkbunny as a viable art platform, lest the furries froth at the mouth and demand I be publically executed.

And it really, really makes me come to regret ever coming out publicly with this stuff. But, if I didn't, then I'd be caught out some other way, because there are legitimately harmful people who are """protecting the children""" by doxxing and harrassing anyone who engages with cub art. I would be found out. I would be revealed. And people would shame me for drawing this. Plus, I'll be real, it's been a huge benefit to many other people I've talked to about my cub art, since I've connected with a community of like-minded people, and helped others realize that this coping method would work wonders for them to if they engaged with it like I do.

But none of that changes the fact that I've been through immense suffering. Harrassment waves, being misgendered, people telling me to kill myself, so much more. All in the name of "justice". A sick, perverse sense of justice, that punishes people for existing wrong. Something that queers go through daily, but don't take the time to self-reflect on when they find a transgender person to call a pedophile repeatedly.

I am who I am.
And everyone around me makes me regret that.